Every so often, Silas talks us into playing Risk.

                       

I don't know why we go through this; it's always the same. I get Australia and South America, Ethel gets North America, and Silas tries to hold onto Europe. I start to make big headway, then they gang up on me - if I do hold out, then we reach the part of the game where the world teeters on "who gets the next turn-in".

Silas has gotten much better; when he was younger, he would do really stupid stuff - okay, not STUPID, but SILLY. He'd suddenly put all of his armies on Iceland and decide to try to take North America from his mother. This game, he did indeed try to hold onto Europe for a while, but then he took Africa from me (I'm blue, Silas is green, and Ethel is red) and now things are going to be holding on for a while.

I know that folks think that "family time" is a great idea - but how much good can it do the family to have each member of the family trying to wipe the others off of the planet? And to smile and giggle in glee when doing so?

And this always result in the offended party snarling, and swearing revenge. It's not the sort of family picture you want on your Christmas Card.

Ethel always says that she hates playing Risk, then she gets positively maniacal when she gets North America, and starts building up a buffer zone in northeast Asia. Her eyes get just a little wild....it's sort of upsetting. It's like being married to a cross between Hannibal Lector and George Patton - she's always waiting for enough resources to make it all the way to Moscow.

Me, I just grab my two little continents and then build up armies, and try to take one little country from each of them to keep them from building up too much strength. I am, always, a conservative at heart, and a coward by trade.

These games always last longer than one day, and it's hard for me to go back to them after several days because I know that there are two ways that the games can go:

1) I can lose, which means that I've lost, or
2) I can NOT lose, which means that I have to keep playing.

See, if I'm not the first person to lose, then that means that some other member of the family has lost, and has gone off by him/herself to mope. The other result of not losing is that there are now two people, and they have no choice but to attack each other, which means that things get even more cutthroat than they were already.

So it's best if I just lose. But I am not the sort of guy who can do that on purpose.

Fortunately I won't get home until about 7:20 tonight, so I won't have to face those choices. And tomorrow night, Silas will be working when I get off.

So there's a general cease fire until Friday evening.